30: at least part of me is superhuman

I should probably talk about what I learned from blogging thirty consecutive days in a row, but I didn’t make a list of things that I’m thankful for on Thanksgiving day, and the same rebellious streak that kept me from it then demands that I resist the obvious topic now.

Today is also my last day to write something awesome about my dog and try to win handmade treats for her. I love my dog, and she loves treats, but it simply isn’t going to happen today. I’m tired! My mind is barren and empty! I can hardly conjugate verbs, much less write the Ode to a Flighty Retriever that I had in mind.

I went to the dentist today for the first time in two years. In the past, my dentist has behaved like a pirate, leading me to distrust everyone who works with teeth. I had expected to garner a lot of vitreous material to put into my last post of the month. I saw a new dentist, though, and he was great. The technicians didn’t try to talk to me when they had their hands in my mouth, he didn’t ask me what my favourite subject is in school, I wasn’t scolded for my spotty flossing habits, and they didn’t even make me brush with fluoride. It was surprising and pleasing. Also, I don’t have any cavities or gum cancer or other nasty tooth diseases. I didn’t expect any problems, but I’ve never had a cavity and so am paranoid that I might get one and not recognize the feeling.

Two especially awesome moments:

1. Watching Blues Clues play silently on the ceiling TV while a technician scraped plaque from my molars and the Scissor Sisters’ I Don’t Feel Like Dancing played on the radio. Surreal.

2. Having the dentist tell me that my teeth are superhuman. What he said, exactly, was, “I’ll have a heart attack if we find any cavities.” Then the technician said, “I think we’ll all have heart attacks if you find any cavities.” “Yes. Her teeth are superhuman,” the doctor said. Then he invited me to join them in admiring my x-rays.

Superhuman teeth! I was delighted.


~ by Not Alice on December 1, 2006.

2 Responses to “30: at least part of me is superhuman”

  1. Oh, LUCKY YOU!! I, sadly, do not have superhuman teeth. What I DO have is a pathological fear of dentists – even mine, who’s probably the sweetest, gentlest man on the planet. Nope, I’ve got to be sedated to have any work done. Out-cold-stoned on prescription something-or-other that will allow me to survive a filling without the mother of all anxiety attacks.

    I’m abashed to admit, I’m envious of you for your teeth….

  2. In addition to being superhumanly resistant to cavities, my teeth are also almost perfectly straight. My mouth is blessed.

    The dentist fear is really a pity. I used to not like them at all, but now that I’ve seen how comparatively awful doctors can be, I appreciate dentistry and feel able to accept whatever they put me through with complete docility. Of course, my opinion might change completely with my first filling, whenever that may be.

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